Hey Folks! I'm finally settled (more or less) into my new house. More importantly, I have a solid internet connection, so I now have absolutely no excuse not to write regularly.
In the down-time that I found myself with yesterday, I sat down and began reading my new copy of The Scarlet Pimpernel. Incidentally, about a week ago I found the website scarletpimpernel.com which offers a free e-book version of the text as well as some interesting info about the novel and its many theatrical and on-screen productions. The book is great so far. Plenty of intrigue as the Scarlet Pimpernel smuggles innocents out of the clutches of Madame Guillotine and across the French border, always right under the nose of the citoyens of the Commitee for Public Safety . As promised, I'll share my thoughts on the story after I've finished my initial read.
Today, instead of spitting out a lengthy diatribe on some crazy idea of mine, I've decided to do something a bit different. I want to ask you for some help. I need some inspiration, and who better to inspire me than you? So tell me...
Who is the most intriguing person you can think of?
Is it an international country-hopping uncle? The protagonist of your favorite novel? Your WWII pilot grandfather? A rockstar scientist? Guy Fawkes? Jack Bauer from 24? Sean Connery as James Bond (Suck it Trebek!!!)? Real or fictional, it doesn't matter as long as they're intriguing. Feel free to comment on this post with your answer or to send it an email to modernmanofmystery@gmail.com. Just don't tell me that Bono is the most intriguing person you can think of.
No. I don't care that he's been knighted. He's a narcissistic douche, he has a last name, and his glasses are stupid.
Hey folks! Sorry I've been a little slow on the posts this past week. I know you've been waiting on the edge of your couch or computer chair for another set of my ramblings (the sarcasm doesn't transfer quite like I'd hoped), but I just finished moving from my modestly sized, cookie cutter, two bed, two bath, second floor apartment to a modestly sized, cookie cutter, two bed, two bath, house closer to my job and the rest of civilization. After tomorrow, I'll be writing on a more regular basis.
So...on to the actual point. A few days ago, after realizing exactly how much useless crap I've accumulated in my apartment over the past 2 years, I turned on the television for some mindless entertainment and sat myself down to start sorting through my things. My first endeavor? The mountain of books, magazines, random papers, and mail on my desk. A few overflowing recycle bins later, my conquest was complete and I decided to celebrate with a certain choice adult beverage. As I sat down in my chair to enjoy said beverage, this gem of a commercial caught my attention:
Of course, the barely subliminal "DRINK THIS BEER!!!" message of the advertisement was completely and totally wasted on me. It must have been pure coincidence that the certain choice adult beverage slowly sweating in my hand was in fact a Dos Equis with lime. Yeah...Right...I'll keep telling myself that. What struck me more than just the advertising mumbo-jumbo were the actual words of this most interesting fictional character.
"Unless our whole conversation is going to be in Spanish...Don't lead off with 'Hola.'"
This quote, along with the tag-line for the video, "Saying you're 'conversational' in another language requires conversation," basically encapsulates my feelings about learning a foreign language. Most of you probably know this, but for those of you who aren't aware, I am employed as a Retail Sales-Monkey for Rosetta Stone Ltd. at the DFW Airport. For any hermits, who while totally out of touch with the world somehow happen to be reading this blog, Rosetta Stone is a great language learning software system that you can find more about here or by sending me an email (before you ask, yes, it does actually work).
Undoubtedly, most of you have taken at least one year of formal foreign language lessons either in high school, college, or in a private class, and I'm willing to venture that 80 percent of you took those lessons in Spanish. The real question is how many of you 1. Think you understand the basics of Spanish. 2. Can muster a rousing ¿Donde esta la biblioteca?¡Una más cerveza! or Si...tengo un gato en mis pantalones! but 3. Have absolutely no clue what I mean when I say Español puede ser muchisimo más hermoso que francés cualquier día de la semana, without first clicking that link to see the clumsy Google translation. If you now understand, but don't believe me, take a few minutes out of your day to watch this video homage to Pablo Neruda's Poema 20:
So many people simply dismiss learning another language because they think it's too hard, they just don't get it or they just don't care about different languages. And don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to say that learning a new language is the easiest thing I've ever done: you can't actually learn the Spanish language just by watching Mexican Soap Operas. If we all learned English by watching The Young and The Restless, we'd be talking almost constantly about Alex's scandalous and steamy love affair, how Andrew was framed for the murder of his own father, and how Bradley finally met the son that his jealous high school flame kept secret for all these years. No, it wasn't simple, but it was nowhere near as hard as people will tell you it is. And what I'm really getting at is that you should give it another another try. Learning another language is about more than just satisfying core requirements. My life is actually better because I speak Spanish, and I'm talking beyond being able to read classic Spanish literature, to understand the lyrics of a Juanes song, or to put that coveted Bilingual bullet point on my resume. When I order in Spanish at the little Taqueria around the corner, the lady always smiles and adds a little extra to my plate of Carne Guisada. When I speak to the Mexican maintenance man in his own language, he doesn't charge me for the little piece of plastic that I broke off of the window blinds. When I go abroad to a Spanish speaking country, people don't treat me like an ignorant self-entitled American. Sound rewarding enough?
Well, the biggest and most simple tenet to language learning is to actually use what you've learned. Simple enough, right? Don't read a book or go to class for three hours a week and just leave it at that like the multitude of gringos you know. Don't be afraid to go talk to someone, order your food in Spanish, watch a video with a transcript on Spanish NewsBites, tackle an easy to read article on BBC Mundo. Make a little more effort, and I promise you'll be rewarded. Hell, you can even send me an e-mail (e.b.hawkins@gmail.com). I'll be happy to help you. And as long as you're not simply satisfied with the two dollar phrasebook standards Hola, Como esta, and Donde esta el baño, you're already leagues ahead of the rest. Just get it out of your head that you'll never learn, and try something new. Open your mind! EXPAND YOUR HORIZONS!!! Sigh... I'm going to stop there before I become a living breathing cliché.
Until next time,
Eric Hawkins Modern Man of Mystery (in Making)
P.S. Why the hell did it take me this long to think of The Most Interesting Man in the World? Talk about a source of inspiration...Oh, and if you ever feel the urge to say 'Si...tengo un gato en mis pantalones!' to my face, be prepared for a punch in the mouth.
First off, before I start rambling, I want to say that I really appreciate all the love, feedback, and positive mojo you all are sending me about this thing. My schedule has been crazy this past week, but I'll try to start writing a bit more often. Now, on to the real post.
Those of you who know me personally have my permission to skip this paragraph, as I'm sure you already understand how I operate (plus I'm really not one to sing my own praises, so I'll make this quick). I am probably one of the most level-headed, forgiving, accepting, and understanding people that you will ever meet (who is not either in a coma or dead, and as of 9:00 AM this morning I do, in fact, still have a pulse). I hardly ever hold a grudge, I don't often get jealous, I am incredibly patient, and there are very few things that truly upset me.
"to reclaim the title of Man of Mystery and give it new meaning...own it."
And in the hours following that post, I caught myself seriously wondering what the hell I actually meant. I mean, it sounds great, but it's a probably a bit prolific for a 23 year old nobody living in Corinth, Texas. So I turned to the first place any internet-savvy person in the modern age would; Google. To say I was simply disappointed would be a serious understatement, but amidst the mix of half-naked pictures of Mike Myers as Austin Powers, home-made music videos for a certain Muse song, and not-so-relevant (albeit interesting) articles about about Wikileaks founder Julian Assange, and his ego-trip to British prison, I found my first lead:
About two weeks ago, while driving home from a friends and family sort of weekend trip, a Peterbilt eighteen-wheeler truck collided with my tiny two-door Toyota Celica. My dog and I had the extreme good fortune to walk away completely unscathed, but since the accident, I've had all manner of crazy thoughts run through my head. God knows what's going on in my dog's...
It started with the typical questions you would expect: Did all of that really happen? How did I survive the crash? How is every bone in my body not broken? Why didn't the F@*#ing airbags deploy?!? Then a bit more existential: Why am I still alive? What have I done with my life? What does my life actually mean? Now all of those questions have passed, but one thought has stuck in my head like the latest crappy pop song: Why isn't my life great?
I have a decent job, a place to live, food on the table, a college education, supportive friends and family, and the "all the opportunity in the world" cliche that, together, point to the idea that my life is in fact good...but let's be real for a second...What the hell does that even mean? How dothose five things make me any different from 98% of the other twenty-something college grads in America? How am I unique? Its time to make a change...This is where that change starts.
There's no more room in my life for good, average, or ordinary...only awesome, atypical, unusual, and brilliant. I want to be remarkable. I want to reclaim the title of Man of Mystery and give it new meaning...own it. What all that entails, I'm not completely positive. More importantly...I intend to share it all with you.
So I'll start out with some semi-coherent ramblings, some things that I find important, and some stepping stones on my way to true Man of Mystery status, but to be honest, I have no idea where this thing is going to lead. Then again...isn't that half the fun? Would you even bother reading the rest of a book if the author laid out every twist, turn, and exactly how the story would end in the first 5 pages? What I'm really saying is stick around...This is just page one...and I'll definitely make it worth your read.
